I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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