You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
