Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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