i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
