Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
