Dual....:-)
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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