I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
