That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
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