Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
