belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
