Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
