My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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