Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
