He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
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