He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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