Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
