you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
