I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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