Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
