Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I think I died a long time ago.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
