yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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