A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
lets start a swedish sibling band together
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize
