Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Buhtt sex?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Randomize
