She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
