Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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