Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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