I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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