he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
