sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
