I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
