drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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