When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize