me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
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its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
