this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
