Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
