So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
We have so much sex to catch up on
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
