do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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