All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I don't deserve a penis
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize