this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
