You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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