I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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