Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
