I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
