so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
