Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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