is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
