I'm drive I can fine osifer
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
