my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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