So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
