Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize